Brand-named people: Unbelievable but true

Some are huge fans of a brand, others want to stand out, and the rest… well, they can all be considered bad parents, marking their children for life like that. People can go to extremes when choosing exotic and original baby names, some of them funny and others just plain awful. Check out some crazy examples.

I’m binge-watching you, Netflix

It caused a stir on social networks: a baby born in May 2018 in the Colombian municipality of Vigía del Fuerte, Antioquía, was registered under the name of the platform that is driving everyone crazy (his parents included, apparently).

And it isn’t just Netflix but Nexflix de Jesús. Last names Rodríguez Restrepo.

Disbelief, criticism, and mocking were the main reactions. Some people even believed it was a strategy by Netflix themselves. But we already know that it’s not the first crazy move by a fan of the platform.

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Apples everywhere

Apple is already a common name, even among Latin Americans. Need proof?

Apple Guadalupe from Panama; Apple Clin, Apple Whoopi, and Apple Valentín (for a boy, really?) from Peru.

Remember Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow’s kid? I bet these kids don’t have a last name as common as Martin…

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So I don’t have to Google you

If there are many Apples around the world, there had to be a Google. In 2005, two Panamanians called his son Oliver Google Kai.

In Sonora, Mexico, the Civil Registry published a list of names forbidden for being demeaning or pejorative and this included brand names of “tech giants” such as Google (also Twitter, Facebook, Yahoo, and even famous characters like James Bond) in order to avoid children being bullied, in addition to recommending nice-sounding and uncomplicated names.

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Crazy on wheels: Mazda and Chevy

Colombia is a country where we can find some of the strangest names: was this man crazy about cars or did he just think that the name sounded nice? We don’t know but he called his daughter Mazda Altagracia Ramírez.

And in Argentina, a declared motorsport fan called his son Chevy, since Chevrolet is one of the most important brands in the country with a long history.

Since 2015, Argentina’s new Civil and Commercial Code states that sexless names (when you can’t tell if it’s a boy or a girl), foreign, and aborigine names are allowed, as long as they do not affect the good name and honor of the person. Sorry Chevy, no problem with yours.

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Son, walk and drink: Johnny Walker

In Paraguay, a person registered his son under the name of the famous Scotch whiskey, although with a slight modification: Jonny Walker Cano.

Juan Carlos Vega, secretary general of the Paraguayan registry office, told a newspaper that the country has a law that prohibits names that create confusion over the baby’s gender but not those that are just rare.

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Walt Disney of All Saints

Well, not “of All Saints” but close: A man is called Walt Disney de los Santos (literally, Walt Disney of the Saints). He was born in Uruguay, a country that loves exotic baby names.

Apparently, there’s also a Disney Landia (Disneyland) Rodríguez Juárez somewhere in the world.

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Brothers Batman and Pink Floyd Flash

Batman and Flash are a pair of Colombian brothers. No, it’s not a joke: two siblings are called Batman and Pink Floyd Flash (yeah, the latter is a bit too much). The funny thing is that they chose their own names.

The sons of an eccentric Colombian painter, the Camargo brothers chose their own names at 8 and 4 years old, respectively. And of course, they went with those of their fictional heroes, one of them adding Pink Floyd since his mother would make him listen to The Wall all the time.

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Navy forever: Olnavy and Usnavy

Olnavy (all-nah-vee, from Old Navy) and Usnavy (oos-nah-vee, from U. S. Navy) are some of the craziest names anyone has ever heard of. Clearly, their parents are US Navy fanatics.

The kids “blessed” with these names were born in Venezuela and Cuba, a pair of Latin American countries where we can find all kinds of strange names.

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Uber, the taxi driver

No, it’s not a joke and there’s proof. Not a fake ID photo but a video: Uber Jiménez, taxi driver, was on Costa Rican TV.

He’s not the only Uber in Costa Rica so the show didn’t feature any comments on his name but, due to the funny connection between his first name, his profession, and the brand (and how taxi drivers love Uber), it was definitely a hit on social media.

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Bonus: Uruguayan new age names

Uruguay is a whole different story: Filete (fillet or stake), Flor de té (tea flower), Árbol (tree) or Oxígeno (Oxygen) are some of the most eccentric names you’ll find in the South American country (apparently, they accept any name you can think of).

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